Wrong Answers Only
Playing solitaire on a cold weekend.
My local board game cafe, Crossroads Tabletop Tavern, is having troubles through no fault of its business model. It’s a long story. But it boils down to a clash between the store’s founder, who’s a friend of mine, and a onetime business partner, who isn’t. There may be a fundraiser to save it, or it may turn out okay on its own, or it may disappear by spring. Right now, we just don’t know.
In addition to their main business, the store sells games of all types, and that’s how I picked up a copy of Wrong Answers Only. The phrase “wrong answers only” appears on many a social media post, inviting your friends to be clever and imaginative even when the answer seems obvious.
“Oh, that’s the Tin Woodman from The Wizard of Oz.” Get it?
The phrase has inspired a comedy podcast and a novel, but the board game tests both creativity and “how well do you know your friends”? And it might also be a bit of an exercise in style, because the player whose authorship is least obvious is the winner.
We rarely have a gathering that allows us to play the game as it’s meant to be played, but I’ve been having some fun with the questions anyway. “What is Superman’s only weakness?” Captain Marvel’s 1940s sales figures. (Okay, I admit “Lois Lane in her pajamas” is a funnier answer. But the bit of comics trivia is more…me.)
“What sank the Titanic?” The Ever Given.
“What is the big bang theory?” The reason I stopped paying for network TV.
“America’s Next Top ___” Embarrassment.
“What is Brexit?” When Brutosaurus Rex walks out of the house and tramples its fence. See also, “Time to buy a new fence.”
“What is a plunger used for?” Assault, if Saturday morning cartoons didn’t lie to me.
“What is Darth Vader’s day job?” Darthvading.
“What is James Bond’s best gadget?” The undetectable condom.
“What is a burpee?” A baby who just stopped crying.
“What was your first job?” Burping my baby brother.
“What’s a good cure for hiccups?” Being struck by lightning in the shower. Or maybe that causes them, I forget.
“What are Girl Scout Cookies made of?” Sugar and spice and everything ni—wait—oh, no!
Here, I’ve left some for you. Pick your two favorites:
What does OMG stand for?
What does IHOP stand for?
What do people celebrate on Cinco de Mayo?
How does James Bond take his martini?
What is Luke Skywalker’s weapon of choice?
What happens in Vegas?
What is the second amendment?
What is tofu made from?
What does the early bird get?
Where do babies come from?
Wrong answers only. 😉